Residents of Karachay-Cherkessia appreciated the mufti's call to reduce wedding costs.

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Weddings in Karachay-Cherkessia are often so burdensome that families have to take out loans; however, some refuse lavish celebrations, local residents noted, commenting on the statement of the elders of the Uruppsky district and the call of the mufti of the republic to reduce wedding expenses.

As reported by "Caucasian Knot", the elders of the Uruppsky district of Karachay-Cherkessia appealed to the mufti of the republic with a request to assist in reducing wedding expenses, which often become a heavy financial burden for families. They proposed to conduct explanatory work among the population and to organize wedding ceremonies in accordance with national customs, spiritual values, and religious norms.

The cost of holding wedding celebrations in KCR can exceed one million rubles

Residents of Karachay-Cherkessia told a correspondent of "Caucasian Knot" about the peculiarities of holding weddings. The survey is not representative and reflects only the private opinions of those interviewed.

Wedding traditions in the Uruppsky district do not significantly differ from those accepted in other parts of Karachay-Cherkessia, said local resident Liana. According to her, families choose the venue for the celebration primarily based on financial capabilities. "In our district, there is no special wedding specificity; everything is about the same as in the rest of the republic. Those who want to hold a wedding in a large banquet hall go to Cherkessk, for example, to Royal Hall or other establishments. Those with a smaller budget can organize the celebration in the stanitsa of Pregradnaya or neighboring Mednogorsk. There are also establishments that can be rented for weddings. And some families still hold weddings at home," she said.

In the stanitsas of Zelenchukskaya and Storozhevaya, even the most modest weddings usually have at least 100 guests, while celebrations for 300 people are considered average in scale, said a native of Karachay-Cherkessia, resident of the Zelenchuksky district Ruslan Kipkeev.

Three hundred people is rather an average number; often significantly more are invited.

"At weddings, we usually have no less than a hundred guests, even if the celebration is considered modest. Three hundred people is rather an average number; often significantly more are invited. Nowadays, most weddings are held in special banquet halls rather than at home. For example, recently a fellow villager organized a wedding at Royal Hall in Cherkessk. For the entire event, including the banquet, wedding cortege, gifts to the bride's relatives, and other expenses, he spent about six million rubles. But this was a wedding on a grand scale, significantly above the average level. It's hard to name a minimum cost since some families still hold weddings at home, although this is much rarer now," he said.

Kipkeev considers such expenses excessive and unjustified. In his opinion, the desire to hold a lavish celebration is often associated with social pressure and the desire to demonstrate wealth. "People often throw lavish weddings not for themselves, but for what others will say. A competition begins: whose wedding is better, more expensive, more grand. At the same time, they spend huge amounts of money, and sometimes just a week, a month, or six months later, the young couple divorces. And the question arises: what were all these expenses for?" - noted the interlocutor.

According to Kipkeev, many middle-income families are forced to borrow money or take out loans to hold weddings. "If we talk about middle-income families, most go into debt for the wedding; some even take out loans. Unfortunately, in our society, this has become almost the norm. The exception, in my observations, are religious Karachays. They try not to go into debt, hold modest weddings, and do not chase after ostentatious luxury because they do not seek to prove anything to anyone, do not pay attention to others' opinions, and do not compete with others in the scale of the celebration," he explained.

A resident of the Ust-Djegutinsky district Milan, whose wedding took place a few months earlier, confirmed that weddings for about 300 people are considered ordinary in Ust-Djeguta. According to her, both families bear the expenses for the celebration, although their obligations differ.

The higher the family's status, the more people want to come to their wedding.

"For us, 300 people is the most ordinary, average wedding. About 150 guests come from the bride's side, the rest from the groom's side. Since the groom's family organizes the wedding, they need to know in advance how many people will come from the bride's side to prepare tables, order food, and everything necessary. The groom's side includes relatives, including distant ones, neighbors, and friends. There are weddings for 500-600 people and even for a thousand. It all depends on the family, the number of relatives, and their social status. The higher the family's status, the more people want to come to their wedding," she said.

According to Milana, even a relatively modest wedding requires significant expenses from the groom's family. "The groom pays for the venue rental, cars, wedding table, and the organization of the celebration itself. If we look at the experience of my close relatives who recently had weddings, even a not too luxurious celebration costs the groom's side about 700-800 thousand rubles. This is the minimum level if you don't order too many dishes and don't hold an especially lavish wedding. If you want to hold a grand celebration, expenses exceed one million rubles. And this is only the expenses of the groom's family," she explained.

At the same time, the bride's family, according to Milana, can spend a comparable amount on the dowry, which is called "berne" among the Karachays. "Among the Karachays, there is the concept of "berne" - the bride's dowry. In my opinion, in the form that this custom exists now, it has become one of the biggest problems. Many young people would like to refuse excessive expenses, but the older generation continues to insist on adhering to established rules. Berne is not only the bride's personal belongings, her clothes, jewelry, and household appliances that she brings to her husband's house. It also includes gifts to the groom's relatives, not only the closest ones but also distant relatives, neighbors, and even neighborhood children," she said.

She emphasized that the preparation of the dowry begins long before the wedding, as the family fears criticism from the groom's relatives. "It can be difficult for girls to get married also because all these gifts need to be collected in advance to be ready for the wedding and not to lose face. Later, women from the groom's family discuss whether the bride's dowry was rich or not. If the berne is expensive, everyone films it, sends it via WhatsApp* to relatives. As a result, the contents of the dowry become known to almost the entire republic. Therefore, the family tries to prepare everything at a high level so that no one criticizes them," the interlocutor explained.

According to Milana, expenses for the dowry and gifts can reach one million rubles, and in some cases exceed this amount. "If you collect all the gifts, household appliances, personal belongings, and everything else that the bride must bring to the groom's house, it can take about a million rubles. Even when trying to save, we are talking about very large sums. It turns out that the groom's side spends 700-800 thousand rubles or a million on the wedding, while the bride's family can spend a comparable amount on the berne," she noted.

According to Milana, not all families have such means, so loans and credits have become a common way to finance weddings. "Of course, most families cannot afford this. I probably have never seen a wedding that was held entirely with their own money, without debts or loans. It seems to me that someone always borrows from someone. This has become so habitual that people already perceive debts as an integral part of wedding preparation," said the resident of Ust-Djeguta.

Weddings have turned into a competition

Weddings in Karachay-Cherkessia usually gather from 200 to 300 guests, and expenses even for a relatively modest celebration can start from one million rubles, said Marina, a professional wedding photographer.

"Karachays have large families, and it is customary to maintain kinship ties up to the seventh generation, so there are quite a few relatives. At the same time, weddings here are not as grand as, for example, in Dagestan, where the number of guests sometimes reaches a thousand. At the weddings I have attended or photographed, there were usually 200-300 people, less often - fewer. The most modest celebrations cost about one million rubles, and there is virtually no upper limit on expenses. If we judge by publications on Instagram*, some may spend more on a single wedding dress than this amount. However, I do not have accurate current prices, as I have not been particularly interested in them for the last few years," she said.

According to Marina, expenses for a Karachay wedding traditionally consist of several components, and the celebration itself is just one of them. "The first part is the wedding itself: banquet hall, dress, artists, cars, and everything else. The second is the gifts exchanged between the families of the groom and bride. The groom's family gives the bride gold jewelry: for example, a set from the mother, a ring from the brother, a chain from the sister. It is also customary for the bride's side to give gifts to the groom's relatives: a ring for the sister, a suit or watch for the groom, and other gifts for his father and brother. Specific rules may vary from village to village, but the general order is about the same. The third part is the bride's dowry: furniture, household appliances, dishes, and other items that the young family will use in their home," she explained.

In the past, on the contrary, it was frowned upon when the bride's side made too many gifts.

In her opinion, modern wedding expenses are excessive and often distort the meaning of traditional rituals. "In the past, on the contrary, it was frowned upon when the bride's side made too many gifts. It was said that this was like "an addition to a bad bride," as if the groom's family was being paid extra to take the girl as a wife. Today, however, expensive gifts and the grandeur of the celebration are often perceived as an obligatory part of the tradition, although originally there was no such meaning in it," she said.

In Marina's family, they try to hold weddings according to financial capabilities. Relatives help the newlyweds with money, but she does not know of any cases where her close ones had to take out loans for the celebration. "In our family, relatives help each other: today there is a wedding in one family - they give them money, next year there is a wedding in another - they help them. Everyone gives as much as they can. The last ones to marry in our family were my nephews. The young couple insisted on a modest wedding, without invited artists and other expensive elements. Everything went well, without huge expenses," the interlocutor said.

At the same time, according to her observations, even an expensive wedding does not spare the family from discussions and criticism from others. "There is an unpleasant peculiarity of human nature here: it doesn't matter how you hold the wedding, it will still be discussed. They will discuss the brands, the color of the dress, the food on the tables, the chosen restaurant. There is no such thing as spending a million or ten million - and no one will say anything. They will still discuss, send videos via WhatsApp*, post reels. Therefore, the desire to avoid criticism through large expenses, in my opinion, is pointless," Marina believes.

Excessive wedding expenses are not so much related to traditional Karachay customs as to families' desire to demonstrate wealth and not fall behind others, believes local resident Larisa. In her opinion, returning to the original meaning of the rituals would significantly reduce expenses without abandoning national traditions.

Customs do not require turning a wedding into a kitsch with fireworks, expensive ensembles, and all sorts of shows.

"To be honest, I don't know what exactly the elders of the Uruppsky district propose: to refuse restaurants, limit expenses, or prohibit certain gifts. But overall, I am for families spending on weddings as much as they can afford. At the same time, I advocate for preserving customs, or rather - for returning them to a reasonable norm. No one will be impoverished by a handful of candies or small tokens of attention to relatives: a scarf for the groom's mother, books for his father. Customs do not require turning a wedding into a kitsch with fireworks, expensive ensembles, and all sorts of shows," she told the correspondent.

In the opinion of the interlocutor, the clergy and elders should focus not so much on prohibitions as on explaining the original meaning of national rituals. "Elders and the muftiyat should primarily work with people's perceptions of what is worthy and what is not, and help people return to the original traditions. Moreover, there is no need to invent anything new. The Karachays and Balkars have a moral-ethical code "Uzden adet", there are books dedicated to traditional norms of behavior, such as "Adet, adeb, namys". Everything is detailed there. The basis of these ideas is respect, honor, and conscience, and not the necessity to spend ten million rubles on a wedding so that neighbors do not think anything bad," Larisa noted.

She emphasized that the problem of expensive weddings is not limited to the Uruppsky district. "As far as I know, similar discussions, calls, and admonitions have been heard in other districts of Karachay-Cherkessia. This is spoken not only by the elders but also by some youth, representatives of the middle class, and intelligentsia. However, not everyone has the courage to hold a wedding without looking at how their neighbor organized it," the interlocutor explained.

At the same time, Larisa did not notice a stable trend towards a reduction in the number of guests at weddings in recent years. "I have not heard that the number of invited guests has noticeably increased or decreased in the last two or three years. Everything is very individual. Some choose a modest wedding, while others want everything to be expensive and rich. Sometimes the young couple wants a small celebration, but parents and relatives insist on a large one. Here it should be taken into account that for us, a wedding is not only a holiday for the newlyweds, as it often is in Europe. It is a celebration for the entire clan, and sometimes for the whole village," she explained.

In Larisa's opinion, reducing expenses is quite compatible with preserving traditional rituals, as many modern expensive elements have no direct relation to them. "I am sure that expenses can be reduced to a reasonable level if we return to the original adat and refuse ostentation. Previously, ostentatious wealth in Karachay was considered a great shame. Now, however, there has been a substitution of concepts: people believe that traditional must necessarily be expensive. But expensive and kitschy does not mean traditional at all. Wedding customs appeared several centuries before Instagram*; they existed among all classes. The scale of the celebration was the only difference. Each ritual had its place and significance, and weddings were held according to the family's capabilities. Those who could - would slaughter a bull, those who could not - a lamb. Celebrations were organized at home, neighbors helped, the whole street, the whole village," she said.

There is no requirement in customs for everyone to give a specific amount, wear a dress of a specific cost, or order a specific number of cars.

The interlocutor emphasized that traditions do not set mandatory costs for wedding outfits, the number of cars in the cortege, or the amounts that relatives should spend. "There is no requirement in customs for everyone to give a specific amount, wear a dress of a specific cost, or order a specific number of cars. There are rituals, but it is assumed that the family conducts them according to their capabilities, not on credit. For example, there is a ritual where the bride is led under a cover of scarves to the groom's relatives, and her head is showered with money and candies. No one requires buying ten kilograms of expensive Ferrero Rocher candies and throwing hundred-dollar bills. You can choose ordinary candies and small denominations - the meaning of the ritual will not change," Larisa explained.

However, according to her, social networks and constant comparisons of weddings with each other contribute to increasing expenses. "Now it resembles some kind of Komsomol competition. Everyone sees what others have done and wants to do no worse, but better and more expensive. Then they discuss that at one wedding they threw five-thousand ruble bills, and at another - even more. The problem is not in the traditions themselves, but in the people, especially those who do not particularly think about the meaning of the rituals," the interlocutor believes.

As the most illustrative example, Larisa cited the traditional ritual of removing scarves from the bride, which, according to her, has recently turned into an expensive performance. "Now it is customary to invite an ensemble whose artists remove one scarf after another from the bride to music and dance. Usually, there are five of them. This is accompanied by a singer's performance, fireworks, sometimes a whole show. Depending on the level of the ensemble, this can cost from 20 thousand rubles to 50 or 100 thousand, and sometimes even more. But the matter is not even in the price. Traditionally, the scarves should be removed by a woman from the groom's family - the most respected, usually a mother of many children. This is a ritual of honor and respect. Special respect is given to the woman entrusted with performing the ritual and to the bride, to whom a person enjoying universal respect approaches and touches her scarves. But now instead of her, hired artists are invited," she said.

According to Larisa, some time ago, even male artists performed the ritual of removing scarves, which caused objections from defenders of traditions. "Just a couple of years ago, the scarves were removed even by guys from the invited ensembles. After numerous appeals from public figures, this, as far as I see, has been abandoned. Now men dance, and girls remove the scarves. But the original meaning of the ritual is still lost. It turns out that a ceremony that requires nothing but a few scarves and the participation of a respected woman from the groom's family has turned into a show costing from 50 thousand rubles. Yes, it looks beautiful, you can shoot a video, post reels, show everyone. But it has little to do with real traditions and customs," Larisa concluded.

Elders are concerned about the problems of their fellow countrymen

The Uruppsky district, whose elders have made an appeal to the clergy, is located in the southwestern part of Karachay-Cherkessia. Its administrative center is the stanitsa of Pregradnaya. According to the North Caucasus Statistics, as of January 1, 2025, the population of the Uruppsky district was 23,937 people, or about 5.1% of the population of Karachay-Cherkessia. Of these, 18,478 people lived in rural areas, and 5,459 in the urban settlement of Mednogorsk. For comparison, the neighboring Zelenchuksky district had a population of 53,414, Ust-Djegutinsky - 50,962, and Malokarachayevsky - 42,623.

According to the municipal program for the comprehensive development of transport infrastructure for 2026-2035, the Uruppsky district includes 16 settlements. The area of the district is about 2.8 thousand square kilometers, and the population density is approximately 8.6 people per square kilometer.

The economy of the district is linked to industry, agriculture, trade, and small entrepreneurship. The Uruppsky mining and processing plant operates here. As noted on the investment portal of Karachay-Cherkessia, the most attractive areas for small entrepreneurship are trade and agriculture.

In 2025, the Uruppsky district ranked first among municipal districts of Karachay-Cherkessia in terms of average salary of employees in organizations. According to North Caucasus Statistics, it was 67 thousand rubles compared to 58 thousand on average in the republic. In the neighboring Zelenchuksky district, the figure was 58.1 thousand rubles, and in Ust-Djegutinsky - 61.6 thousand. At the same time, the statistics do not account for small business workers and do not reflect the incomes of all families.

Liana believes that the economic situation in the Uruppsky district does not always reflect the material capabilities of individual families. "Although the Uruppsky district is considered poor, Karachay families here are not necessarily impoverished. Many engage in agriculture, have land, raise livestock, and earn income from this. There are many Russians living in the district, and Karachays, by my rough estimates, make up about 20%. At the same time, among the Karachays, there are families that actively engage in land and livestock farming. Therefore, some of them have enough means to hold large weddings," explained the resident of the Uruppsky district.

Ruslan Kipkeev, in turn, does not associate the elders' appeal from the Uruppsky district with the fact that weddings there are more expensive than in other parts of Karachay-Cherkessia. "The Uruppsky district is considered one of the poorest and economically lagging districts of the republic. It is geographically remote from other territories, located almost on the periphery. Therefore, I do not think that weddings there are more expensive. Rather, the initiative arose precisely there because there were elders who are particularly concerned about their people, who care about their problems and are ready to act. I think this is where the difference lies," the interlocutor explained.

A significant portion of money goes to the services of photographers and videographers

In addition to renting a restaurant and wedding table, a significant part of expenses consists of the services of photographers, videographers, and decoration of the celebration, said Milan.

"From the outside, it seems that the main expenses are the restaurant and wedding table. The wedding is held, the guests disperse - and that's it. But in reality, there are many costs that remain behind the scenes and hit the wallet very hard. This is added to by the photographer, videographer, wedding dress, hairstyle, makeup, and bridal bouquet. Each of these services costs money, and in the end, a very large sum accumulates," she explained.

This race - whose wedding is more beautiful and better - continues to this day.

According to the interlocutor's observations, the popularity of wedding pages on Instagram* contributes to the increase in expenses for photo and video shooting. "In our republic, there are many wedding pages and groups on Instagram*. Girls want their wedding photos to get into these public pages. To do this, they try to find good photographers and videographers so that they also post the shots on their pages, so that the photos then spread across the internet. This race - whose wedding is more beautiful and better - continues to this day. Therefore, the prices for sought-after photographers and videographers are very high," Milan said.

According to her, some families separately hire specialists to shoot short videos intended exclusively for social networks. "Now some even invite a separate girl who only shoots stories. She comes to the wedding and films vertical videos all day specifically for publication on social networks. So, in addition to the regular photographer and videographer, there is another person who also needs to be paid. And this is already considered a separate wedding service," she noted.

Additional expenses are associated with the decoration of special areas for photographing guests. "A photo zone is a must so that guests can take pictures against the backdrop of flowers, next to the names of the groom and bride. This also costs a lot of money. Floral arrangements on tables, the bridal bouquet, which can cost from ten thousand rubles, makeup, hairstyle, video and photo shooting are paid separately," Milan explained.

The cost of wedding photographers' services in Karachay-Cherkessia varies significantly, and a high price does not always guarantee quality, said Marina, who has experience in wedding photography. "It all depends on how you negotiate and who you end up with. There are photographers who charge 300 thousand rubles for a day's work, and there are those who shoot for 30 thousand or 10. Just a couple of years ago, 10 thousand was practically the lower limit. But the price does not guarantee quality at all. I have seen works for 100 thousand rubles with a tilted horizon, out of focus, and other elementary mistakes. Much depends on the fame of the photographer or videographer. Some have built their name, and clients effectively pay extra for the brand. There are also those who no longer shoot themselves but have organized a studio: young photographers work at weddings, and the finished product bears the name of a well-known master," she explained.

The main items of expenditure for wedding celebrations are restaurant rental, inviting musical groups, organizing shows, decorating the hall, photo zones, buffets, as well as photo and video shooting, Marina said. "Prices depend on the level of performers. You can find an amateur ensemble for about five thousand rubles, or you can invite soloists from the state ensemble for a hundred thousand. The same goes for decoration, music, and other services. Therefore, the cost of a wedding depends not only on the number of guests but also on how expensive performers and contractors the family chooses," she explained.

There is no such thing as weddings being exclusively expensive in one district and completely cheap in another.

According to Marina, she does not observe significant differences in wedding costs between the districts of the republic, although there are specific features in certain settlements. "There is no such thing as weddings being exclusively expensive in one district and completely cheap in another. On average, expenses are roughly comparable. In the republic, of course, there are jokes about Uch-Kek and the Malokarachayevsky district, saying that they like everything to be expensive and rich. But these are just jokes, not an objective assessment. The difference is rather between the city and the village. In Cherkessk, a wedding will most likely be held in a restaurant, while in a village where there are neither restaurants nor cafes, the celebration may be organized at home," Marina said.

According to Ruslan Kipkeev, the most lavish weddings are held in the Malokarachayevsky, Karachay, and Ust-Djegutinsky districts, as well as in Cherkessk. At the same time, modest celebrations are held in all parts of the republic. "Of course, there are families in other settlements who can afford large and expensive weddings. But even in those districts known for lavish celebrations, and in Cherkessk itself, modest weddings are held. This primarily concerns the religious part of the Karachays, who hold celebrations in accordance with Sharia norms," Ruslan Kipkeev said.

At the same time, he believes that it is quite possible to hold a modest wedding without serious consequences for relationships with relatives and neighbors. "The problem is primarily in people's minds. Many are afraid of falling behind imposed trends, constantly think about what relatives and others will say. As a result, due to these prejudices, families themselves suffer. But those who do not participate in the race for others' approval and ostentatious luxury calmly hold modest weddings based on their own capabilities," he said.

Attempts to limit expenses for family rituals have been made in Karachay-Cherkessia before. As reported by "Caucasian Knot", on May 4, 2011, the then mufti of the republic, Ismail Berdiev, announced a fatwa in Cherkessk prohibiting the holding of expensive funerals that are burdensome for many Muslims. The fatwa prohibited the distribution of food packages, gifts, and clothing of the deceased during funeral and memorial rituals. Sanctions were provided for violations of the established order against imams, up to removal from office. Residents of Karachay-Cherkessia interviewed at that time supported the clergy's initiative but doubted the possibility of quickly changing entrenched customs.

Ruslan Kipkeev supported the elders' appeal from the Uruppsky district but expressed doubt that the call of the mufti of Karachay-Cherkessia, Muhammad Erkenov, could change existing customs. "I fully support the elders' appeal. I believe they have set the right direction. However, I think the mufti's calls will not change anything. I do not believe he has enough authority among the population. Therefore, I think many people will not trust his words and listen to them," Kipkeev stated.

In his opinion, the elders could independently organize explanatory work with the population, not limiting themselves to public appeals. "Elders should independently, regardless of anyone, engage in this work. Gather men and women in mosques or other suitable places, conduct conversations, explain what harm excessive expenses cause families. We need to change people's consciousness. Until the attitude towards others' opinions and ostentatious luxury changes, existing customs will not change either," he concluded.

* the activities of the company Meta (which owns Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp) are banned in Russia.